Coping with a PMS Shitstorm

Nip little storms in the bud, so they don’t become full blown shitstorms.


“You can’t calm the storm, so stop trying. What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass.”

-Anonymous Mother trying to placate an anonymous PMS-ing Daughter

Whenever I have drama, my mother listens. Whenever I have drama and I’m PMS-ing, my mother makes popcorn, reads from her list of meditation coping with life skills, and holds my hand.

My storms usually include girls I had thought were my friends, talking about me behind my back, Instagram “I-can’t-believe-she-posted-that-picture” devastation, and “why doesn’t he like me?” depression.

My Mom says it is fundamental to nip lil storms in the bud, so that they don’t become full-blown shitstorms. To do so, we must be mentally elevated, and meditate regularly (She even bought two meditation mats from Amazon – black for her and brown for me).

Mom’s 9 Pearls

  1. Don’t waste time feeling sorry for yourself: Eat Nutella straight from the jar and then, move on.
  2. The world owes you nothing: Do you want to make the grade? Dream it, believe it, work it, achieve it.
  3. Never chase the one you love: Love happens naturally, it can not be captured, chased, structured, or bottled. It evolves.
  4. Replace negative thoughts with positive actions: Kind of like the turn the frown upside-down thing, or the idea that you may determine your life by the perspective you choose. When a problem seems insurmountable, look at it from a different angle. Like, stand on your head and rethink it.
  5. Don’t waste your time trying to please other people (Classic): If something is unfair, say so. If a friend is mistreating another friend, be indignant and speak your mind. If you don’t like sky-blue snow cones, go for the egg-custard one.
  6. Every failure is a chance to improve: Get back up, dust yourself off, and put on your game face.
  7. Apologize: Learn to admit when you are wrong. Honor and honesty are much more powerful than pride.
  8. Dark Chocolate, Milk Chocolate, White Chocolate, Hot Chocolate: This one is pretty self-explanatory.
  9. Take care of your body and your mind: When you are a sensitive soul, you must protect and respect your mind and heart. Choose your friends, wisely. When you have sensitive skin, you must protect and respect your body, especially its most intimate parts. Choose products by informing yourself of the ingredients they include, how they are made, and be sure they are chemical-free.

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